A Cause For Communication — Delilah’s Dilemma
Sometimes there is a lack of communication between couples for the fear of causing a bigger problem or upset.
Delilah shares a dilemma from one of her loyal listeners having a problem with communicating to her husband:
I married a widower with five grown children and18 grandchildren. I have four children and nine grandchildren of my own. The problem is my husband still constantly refers to his deceased wife and talks about her -- where they used to go, what they used to do, how she died; all the things that happened during their marriage. I suppose I'm jealous. Although he tells me how much he loves me, it still hurts and I don't know what to do, if anything. I've kept quiet and let him go on and on because I'm afraid to say anything that might harm our marriage. We were 67 when we were married. I would appreciate any advice you could give me. Joanne
A marriage is when two people become one. They still keep their individuality, but they become one in that they work as a team, and they consider each other at all times. In order to do that, they have to communicate with each other. Joanne, you say you're afraid to speak up and tell your husband how you feel because you don't want to harm your marriage -- but you are harming your marriage by not talking and not being honest about your feelings. You are not allowing your husband to see into your heart because you are hiding your true feelings. If you want your marriage to thrive, figure out a way to lovingly share your heart without accusing him or beating him up about it. Respectfully ask him if he can leave the past in the past and instead of talking about all the places he went with his first wife, to begin talking about all the places you two will go together. Instead of talking about the traditions he had with her, talk about the traditions the two of you will create together. Good luck and God bless you.
How do YOU choose to communicate with your significant other when you're having a problem? Share by commenting below!
Rachel Specht contributed to this post