Holiday DO’s & DON’Ts for Happy Stepmoms:
Holidays can be tough, especially this year, it seems. Money is tight, unemployment is up and the country is in political turmoil. The kids are due to visit, and you’re torn between looking forward to it and dreading potential schedule changes and drama with their mom. The kids may be feeling the same way. Nerves get frazzled during the holidays. This year, prepare yourself. Be strong and keep your stepcouple connection and communication on a high level. Work on it. Take it easy, take breaks and breathe! Here are a few holiday tips to help:
Do be proactive.
Don’t stand back and wish for a bad situation to go away.
Stay present and deal with whatever comes your way.
Cooperate and work together with your partner.
Don’t take the holiday stress and tension out on each other.
Don’t point fingers of blame at each other, the kids or anyone else for that matter. That’s not helpful. Remember everyone feels the pressure, not just you. Use each other for support when you can.
Don’t spend too much money.
Watch out—the two days before Christmas are the worst!
Don’t drink too much alcohol.
Alcohol is a depressant, so if you over drink when you’re feeling depressed or angry, you double the depressive effect on your brain and you’ll feel worse.
Do delegate jobs to your partner.
But don’t get angry if they don’t do things exactly your way.
Do take stock of the good things you have.
Don’t lose sight of what brought you together in the first place. Share holiday affirmations and traditions with each other and the children.Enjoy special moments.
Do think of the kids.
Try not to let your adult stresses affect the little ones.
Do take time together as a couple.
Tell the kids you’re “taking a break.” They’ll be OK.That’s what date nights and master bedrooms are for!
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